You’re all set to have a night out with your partner when the babysitter cancels at the last minute. While it might put a slight crimp in your plans, it doesn’t mean that your night of romance is over, though. After all, date night should never hinge on going out because that’s impractical when you have children. Someone is bound to get sick, something comes up at the last minute, and there’s always going to be a reason to stay put. That’s when you need to know how to have date night at home.
Obviously, if it’s possible, date night should be done outside—and far, far away from the kids. But before you start planning your date night at home, there are some things to consider. “If it’s possible, and your children are old enough, it should start after their bedtime,” advises Ingrid Sthare, founder of Relationship Coaching & Coupling. “If you’ve got a little one and you’re still on the child’s schedule with feeding, you can still create a mini date night that may only be a half-hour.” The important thing is to make time to spend together, because if you think you can catch up on date night, you might not be able to. “It is problematic when people always feel they can make up the time later,” says Sthare. “In that time, resentment builds, so stay on schedule with date night.”
So get the kids in their jammies, light some candles, and get ready to have date night at home with these tips.
Put The Kids To Bed…Now
Sure, they’re cute – especially in their Paw Patrol PJ’s – but keep your kids to their regular bedtime routine. If you let on that Mommy and Daddy have adult plans, your kids will definitely sense the excitement and want to stay up. So be sure to stick to the regular bath/book/bedtime schedule, and your kids should be none the wiser.
Just because you’re home doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t dress up for your date. Fight the temptation to sink into sweats and order a pizza. Put on your favorite frock, spritz on some perfume, and find the fanciest place that will deliver. “Eat in courses and use the fancy china,” says Amanda Stemen, a licensed therapist and owner of FUNdaMENTALGrowth, a therapy, coaching, and consulting business based in Los Angeles, CA. “Pop some champagne or sparkling juice, and pretend to be anywhere else but home.”
Plan A Party For Two
Even though you might be adulting, that doesn’t mean that you can’t have a silly play date/date night with your partner. “Go back to your own childhood and have a slumber party,” advises Stemen. “Blow up the air mattress and throw it in front of the TV. Put on a favorite childhood movie, pop some popcorn, eat some candy, and have a couple drinks if that’s your thing.” The point is to make it fun and funny, so that you get to enjoy your sweetie on a whole new level. You can even play spin the bottle or truth or dare—or whatever your heart desires.
Have A Spa-like Experience
It might not be the same as getting a professional massage from a licensed masseuse, but you can still have a sweet spa-like experience at home. “Prepare the bath tub with flower petals, bubble bath, fancy oils, bath bombs, and soak,” says Stemen. Break out the mud facial masks and give your man a mani, and let him give you a pedicure. Lounge together in your bathrobes, and soak up the silence together.
Be Adults, Not Parents
Even though you’re at home, don’t let your conversation slip into mindless chatter about the kids and cleaning the gutters. Instead, uncork a bottle of wine and just talk about each other. “Instead of discussing the mechanics of your daily schedule, have some questions to ask your partner so that you can discover each other,” advises Sthare. “Even if it only lasts a short period of time because of children waking up, needing a glass of water, or having a bad dream; you’ll look forward to recreating it again.”
Remember, date night is about having uninterrupted quality time with your sweetie, no matter where you are. And really, having date night at home is only limited by your imagination. So let it run wild and see where the night takes you.