The Bachelorette’s Trista Sutter Shares Why She Has A Grateful Heart

Trista Sutter is truly living her Happily Ever After. America’s favorite Bachelorette has discovered the key to happiness is by having a grateful heart and is sharing her story—and others—in her new book. We spoke exclusively with Trista about adopting an attitude of gratitude, her ten-year marriage to Ryan Sutter, and how she can listen to current Bachelor Juan Pablo talk all day long.


Trista, what was the impetus for your book, Happily Ever After?

Gratitude has been such a powerful force in my life. It keeps me grounded in the high times and picks me up in the low times. There are lots of stories from other people, friends and family and lots of research, if you embrace it, you’ll live a happier life. I wanted to write something meaningful. Even though people might think I have a fairy tale life, it hasn’t always been a fairy tale. When you go through human times and hardships, you have to actively choose positivity in order to live happier.

I find people are grateful for only the good things, but you have to be grateful for the bad things, too.

It is what you do with yourself afterwards that counts. You should be sad and let yourself feel the human emotions. Experience life and feel what you need to feel but then pick yourself up by being grateful for having lived through those experiences and what they taught you. There’s a story from JR Martinez in the book; he shared with me his story of how he was literally burning to death for five minutes. The pain of that and the pain of rehab and lots of surgeries would have made someone else miserable, but he said that it was the best thing that ever happened to him. I call them unexpected blessings. You think it’s the most horrible thing that ever happened to you, but it can be the best thing.

How do you incorporate gratitude into your life on an everyday basis?

Well, I think that you have to do it on an everyday basis or otherwise it won’t work. I write down my favorite parts of the day on Twitter and Facebook. It’s a way for me to focus on the positive, even if it was a crummy day.

I think it’s a mindset. You have to find something good, and then once you do, you find more.

Absolutely. The more that you focus on the positive, the more positive you’ll have in your life.

Let’s talk about your Grateful Heart Collection.

I am a huge gift enthusiast, and it helps promote the grateful lifestyle. We have pillows that have inspirational sayings, picture frames and wall art, magnets, bookmarks and tote bags. They are all physical reminders to be grateful all the time.

Yes, because sometimes you do need an actual reminder.

Oh gosh, yes! My mother-in-law came over to help when I was writing the book. She came for 15 days and helped me tremendously. One day, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed; I had had a really bad dream about Ryan. [laughs] There was a cup stuck in the sink and I got so frustrated, and I had to stop myself. I had to tell myself that I was so lucky to have a mother-in-law who was there to help me. Even though I wrote a book about gratitude, I’m not an expert. I have bad days when I get stressed and then I remind myself that gratitude will make me feel better.

Okay, I have to ask how America’s favorite firefighter is and how the kids are?

Aww, Ryan and the kids are great. The kids are 4 and 6, and they are fun. My daughter, Blakesley, is super girly, and my son, Max, is really into video games. His favorite is Mario. They are both very sweet kids, and Ryan is just amazing, too.

Now the new season of The Bachelor is on with Juan Pablo. Any thoughts?

I love this season. I think he’s got a great group of women, beautiful and articulate and intelligent. I’m really excited; he’s a lot of fun so it will be exciting to see what happens. And oh my God, I love his accent. I could listen to it all day.

[laughs] Don’t worry, I won’t tell Ryan.

[laughs] Oh you can tell Ryan. He’s always going to be this Bachelorette’s favorite.


Hair/Makeup: Jennifer Devine Pirozzoli of Devine Beauty
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